HallowThankMas 

I shuddered the first time I heard someone refer to the impending trifecta of holidays as HallowThankMas, because it implied that it’s just one overindulgent, chaotic, sugar-fueled blur, which sadly, it can be, if we let the “dominant cultural narrative” take over.  And it’s hard not to.  I know I’m not the only one who panics when Halloween candy appears right after the 4^th of July, when Thanksgiving decorations are already on sale (in September) at Jo-Ann Fabric, and when the Muzak in Rite-Aid sounds suspiciously holiday-like in October.  A friend of mine is blogging this month about planning for Christmas.  My first reaction was “oy!”, but facing the blur head-on is actually a really good way to slow down and let each part be its own thing.

A few years ago, Stew, Maggie, Sally, and I were on our own for Christmas.  My sister, Hannah, her husband, Steven, and their girls were going it alone as well.   We both fled to my parents’ house in Massachusetts the next day, however, a four-hour drive for us, eight hours for Hannah and Steve.  We arrived wringing our hands and asking our parents “How did you do it? How did you make it so special and entertaining and awesome year after year, just you guys?”  My brother-in-law had the best things-you-can’t-believe-you’re-saying-to-your-kids line from their morning: “Get upstairs and don’t come down until you’ve found some Christmas spirit!” All I remember is our girls opening their gifts and being happy and excited and then looking at us like, “now what?”  I was exhausted from months of trying to make sure they had the HallowThankMas experiences all the media and advertising suggests they should.  It was an instructive moment; all that “stuff” didn’t matter as much as other things did, the deeper magic the girls could sense in the day.

I don’t think there was much parental reassurance beyond some back-patting, knowing laughter, and “you’ll be fine.”  But I realized that I had fallen prey to the “dominant cultural narrative” that says that I have to “make” Christmas (and Halloween and Thanksgiving) happen with gifts and food and decorations, the more the better, even though I have seen “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” more times than I can count.

So as HallowThankMas approaches, a little planning might help, and a little perspective might, too, so that when these holidays come, they can be enjoyed for themselves, and not as part of one big simultaneous sugar high and food coma.  We’ll try to slow things down for the kids at St. Mark’s, with the Turkey Supper October 20^th to raise money for the Homeless Shelter (and to maybe take the edge off of turkey cravings?), special crafts and lessons in the coming months, and yes, they’ll be watching the Grinch in December.  Maybe it’ll take.

Bess